Wednesday, February 2, 2011

A Little Warming

As I woke and ventured outside to right my recycling bin and garbage that the Arctic winds had knocked over, I decided to make a new resolution to expand my carbon footprint as much as possible to try and create some of this man-caused warming we have been hearing about since Al Gore started his sales pitch. If I buy a gas-guzzling SUV and run every appliance in the house simultaneously, maybe I could heat up blizzard-besieged Chicago a tad. If I use my frequent flier miles to embark for Ecuador, maybe the hearty New Englanders can take off a layer. If I keep the home fires burning, perhaps Sarah Palin will avoid frostbite in her front yard. Global warming hysteria was, of course, a profit-motive driven lie. It even turns out the Himalayan glaciers that we were told would be melted away in a quarter of a century are in fact not shrinking at all, but indeed, growing (as may be seen in this report from The Telegraph: As cold as Nashville was this morning, I wish I could induce a bit of warming.

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