The Female Conundrum

ABC Good Morning America's crawl today featured a report of a study that concluded "women who drink wine in moderation have an intellectual edge over men". I wonder how much Federal stimulus money was consumed conducting this research? Obviously, the program was originated by wine-drinking women and the men involved were intellectually challenged in the first place. What hogwash- years ago I went on two dates with a thin, statuesque woman my own height (five feet, nine inches) with stunning red hair in a sort of semi-masculine pageboy cut. She had done her undergraduate work at Vassar, then gone on to film school, and had come to Vanderbilt from up East to go to law school. She was also a black belt in karate and a concert musician (if I remember correctly, on the viola). The first date was to a high end Chinese place that served dim sum and used to be near the Vandy law school campus. The second and final date was at a twenty-four hour coffee shop, late at night also just outside the footprint of the Vandy campus. On that second date, we left autobiographical chitchat to talk about politics. Turns out the Vassar gal was a mega-womynist who thought Eleanor Roosevelt was one of the greatest figures in US history and believed it was great that then First Lady Hillary Clinton was authoring a socialized medicine plan in secret at that time. She must have sensed my waning interest after that meeting for she rang me up saying that I lacked the "kind of confidence" she found sexy in a man. No great loss there I thought as I remembered how she sipped her Chablis with her Chinese fare. My next experience was to that point my only unrequited love, an Israeli girl with several master's degrees also from Vanderbilt. Turns out she too was weened on Germaine Greer and supported an obscure feminist political party in Israel. She said my confidence really put her off- that she liked "vulnerable men". I imagine these two wine swilling ladies are now writing grants for research with my Federally-confiscated dollars or directing studies to demonstrate woman's inherent superiority to man.